Simon is learning to be a wonderful helper. He spends most of his time actually fighting to be allowed to 'help'. Even though he's pretty big for his age, he's still too short and not quite strong enough for some things. However, he's perfectly suited for other things. For instance, I'm still a t-rex as far as using my arms goes (my arms are there, but they're not worth much), so I gave Simon the Shark Quick Vac. He does a pretty darn good job of capturing all his & Rachel's (as well as Andrew's & mine) crumbs. He needs direction to stay on task sometimes, but he'll actually do a pretty good job throughout the whole house if you don't mind hearing the vac for hours. He also was very helpful with uncovering my newly emerging flowers from their covers of leaves. He's very excited about the "Daffy-dills" because they're yellow & green, his favorite colors! He & Andrew picked me one of my miniature ones while I was sick. Today we picked a whole bunch to keep that one company.Rachel, on the other hand, is on the path of destruction. Tell her *not* to do something & you may as well assume she's going to do it. She'll even turn around & look you in the eye with that naughty grin on her face. She's a champion smasher, tearer (terror?!?!), flinger, crammer, & shrieker. Reverse psychology doesn't work (yet?!?!), so telling her to do something just gives her permission. I think I'm getting terrible twos early with her! She's adorable & *loves* to be held, but cross her & she'll make you regret it! ;-)
I'm doing okay. The fact that my arms are still pretty useless is difficult for me. I ended up over-doing it today (I'm pretty sure) even though I kept telling myself to quit. I'm still in a super-tight bra 24 hours a day (except when I shower) & still have tape covering my incisions & the layers of stitches under the skin. I think she's really relying on the pressure from the bra-band & tape to keep those stitches from coming loose. She said I could pull a few, but if I pulled many loose, then I'd be back to where I was before with my implants down my ribs. Not a pretty picture! She also told me that it'd take a full year for all this stuff to be back to 'normal'. :-( Its great that it already 'looks' pretty normal (although I've got weird swelling and/or rippling right now), but it is still a constant reminder of what I've lost & been through.
Its really easy to get caught up in the here & now or stuck in the past. To have the right blend of past, present, & future takes delicate balance; something I'm not sure I have. I have a hard time looking at the future because I'm so focused on where I am or where I've been. However, I'm going to try to use this Lenten season to balance my outlook. Knowing where I've been & how I've gotten where I am is important, but the MOST important place is where I'll spend eternity!
