Not Either-Or, Both Can Live

It breaks my heart that women are basically coerced into pitting their lives against their unborn children's lives. There are many articles, some so recent the abstracts (medical journal summaries) aren't available yet, that prove that cancer during pregnancy is not an either-or situation. Both mother and child CAN live with no change to prognosis in most (if not all) instances. It is a crime for doctors to ignore this information. No woman should be coerced into what amounts to an abortion for any reason. But the blow is even more harsh when the mother is also a victim of cancer! This blow Hs struck me even more harshly right now so close to Mother's Day with an information and prayer request from a FB friend.

I'm going to put some links below with brief summaries of the main points. You'll have to excuse my non-hypertext links, but I'm working with an iPad app...

*This is the best overall article I've found. It is written for the cancer patient and care-givers, not doctors and scientists.
http://www.cancernetwork.com/gynecologic-cancer/content/article/10165/2031260?CID=rss

*This article is kind of a dry medical article, but the conclusion is that even delaying treatment until delivery does not negatively affect the overall prognosis of the mother. In other words, terminating the pregnancy is NOT necessary.
http://www.cancer.net/patient/Coping/Emotional+and+Physical+Matters/Sexual+and+Reproductive+Health/Pregnancy+and+Cancer

*This article indicates that the worst consequence of a cancer diagnosis during pregnancy -- death of the newborn baby -- is actually usually caused by the doctors forcing delivery too soon.
http://journals.lww.com/ijgc/Abstract/2011/08000/Management_of_Cancer_During_Pregnancy__Obstetric.30.aspx

*This article addresses my situation: a breast cancer diagnosis while pregnant. It blatantly says that there is no need for the life of the mother to be at odds against the life of the unborn child.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22308513

*This article addresses cervical cancer that has already invaded the peritoneal space as well as high-risk early disease. Again, conserving the pregnancy does not harm the prognosis for mother OR baby.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/22325661/

*This article addresses a melanoma diagnosis during pregnancy. Again conservative treatment: surgery to remove the tumor only, delivery of the baby, and chemotherapy after delivery is the treatment of choice.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/22331751/

*This article studied 118 women with a diagnosis of various types of cancer during pregnancy. Some miscarried, some terminated, some received treatment, others delayed treatment, but statistically, the prognosis was the same regardless of treatment.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/22410958/

*This article has no abstract available (it is e-Published prior to print publishing), but the title says it all: "Cancer during pregnancy can be treated successfully."
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/22455173/

*This is an older article (1992), but it clearly shows that even then, chemotherapy during pregnancy was known to be minimally risky to the baby and the mother's life.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/1621003/?i=2&from=/22455173/related

*This article has a large sample group and control group. Again, statistically speaking there was no benefit to terminating the pregnancy. There was also no increased rate of birth defects or even preterm deliveries to children exposed to chemotherapy in utero.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/m/pubmed/19745695/?i=2&from=/22410958/related

There are many many many more trifles available, but I've probably already bored you to tears. If you re interested in more articles, look at the bottom of the journal abstracts for the "Related citations" section. You can also do your own search with your own terms on the PubMed database. Whether you look at more articles or not, you now know that there is seldom (if ever) a reason to terminate a pregnancy even with a cancer diagnosis. Please keep this information in your mind and heart to pass on to someone who has this terrible "choice" on their minds. Pray for all the babies that have been (and will be) needlessly killed because doctors don't do their homework when confronted with the "rare" cancer diagnosis during pregnancy. Pray for the doctors in these situations, too. Pray that they think and research BEFORE advising a frightened cancer patient to terminate their pregnancy.

NFP =\= NFL Team-sized Families

Here's a blog I contribute to on occasion. This article is about a doctor changing from prescribing contraceptives to a NFP-only practice. As usual I have made my own comments and emphasis. I post this here on my breast cancer blog because my diagnosis challenged my faith in NFP, but also further cemented the foundation I had in NFP. From my words and experience, I hope more women out there can learn about their bodies through NFP and avoid unnecessary cancers that artificial birth control increase. Using NFP does NOT mean a couple *wants* a bunch of children. Neither does it mean that a couple will *have* a bunch of children. Instead NFP gives us an understanding of how women's bodies work and the ability to work *with* God and our bodies, not against ('contra' in 'contraception' means against) God and our bodies. The only requirement for NFP is that you would accept another child as a gift from God, even if you felt like it was a curse. Openness to life doesn't mean that you want to create a whole bunch more lives; it just means that if that is what God gives you, you'll accept. I completely understand the fear of another pregnancy/child. I was terrified when I conceived my daughter (my last of 6 pregnancies). The pregnancy prior to hers almost killed me when my mmiscarriage lead to excessive bleeding. To be honest, I never really got excited about that pregnancy. Once the terror of the first 12 miscarriage-prone weeks were behind us, we had the terror of a breast cancer diagnosis looming ahead of us. Once I was diagnosed, I seriously asked God to just let me miscarry (I'm so sorry, Rachel) so I wouldn't have to make any hard choices (die without treatment to save my baby or kill my baby to save my life). I felt this way even though I had suffered through 4 previous miscarriages, that, at best, left me hollow and depressed, and, at worst, almost cost me my life. Thankfully, instead of answering my prayer the way I thought I wanted, God directed me to MD Anderson where I could be a part of a program that had been saving the lives of breast-cancer stricken pregnant mothers for 20 years!After I delivered my little girl, I was under strict orders to avoid conception for at least 2 years. I had one nurse-practitioner repeatedly call my judgement into question and try every method she knew to get my husband and me to use artificial birth control. Even though I was scared to death, I remained firm in my decision to use NFP and only NFP to avoid pregnancy. My husband and I were definitely afraid that we would fail in our attempt to TTA. However, by then we had come so far in our marriage and trust in God, that we kept to the narrow road of *very* conservative NFP for TTA. It was difficult, I won't deny that! Yet, we survived and our marriage is definitely stronger now than it was prior to my diagnosis. I don't think any of the Sistas thinks that every couple is called to having bunches of children. I don't think any of the Sistas thinks that practicing NFP to TTA should be avoided at all costs. On the contrary, most of the Sistas have used NFP successfully to TTA at one point or another. Some were ambivalent (like myhusbamd and I) during their TTA cycles, so they failed to avoid (NFP didn't fail, their decision changed). If you and your husband decide that TTA is the choice you should make, feel confident that by using NFP (in any way) you are respecting God's design for marriage. Pray for peace, understanding, love, and grace from God to help you with your discernment and mostly the implementation of your NFP. Together, you, your husband, and God, can and will give you only what you can handle. Grow closer as a couple and as God's children through your journey of avoiding pregnancy. It is possible, since all things are possible with God. Just remember to keep God close to your heart and soul; He'll take care of you! Peace and prayers!

Blessings Amid Curses

Thank you to Abby Johnston for linking to me in her post titled "Bravery"!!

http://www.abbyjohnson.org/2012/04/bravery/

When Abby advises others to look for a local person to donate to instead of the organizations out there with insidious links to abortion, embryonic stem cell research, and wasteful spending, everyone benefits.

Let me tell you, when you're struggling with something like cancer and even a small donation comes through the mail you're absolutely humbled and feel blessed to know that people care!! If you've been praying for a way to finance another treatment and miraculously a donation appears the very next day, you hit your knees and know that God is watching. When you're at your absolute lowest and just don't think you can make it through one more day, but get a kind note from a stranger, you buckle down and keep trying because someone has lifted you in prayer. You really don't know what it is like until you've been there and I'd never curse anyone to go down this road.

This is something that big organizations seldom participate in: the real-world relief from the demon of cancer (or whatever the organization supports). The bigger the organization, most often, the wider the gap between donations and real-world applications. Yes, walks for solidarity are warm and fuzzy, but when the wolf is at the door, warm and fuzzy doesn't keep him out. Raising money for awareness sparks pride, but when younger and younger men and women are being diagnosed, awareness doesn't pay their bills or feed their children. Raising money for research (when funneled through a large middleman organization) sounds humanitarian, but when a young woman is pregnant and newly diagnosed with cancer, the latest research isn't widely available or publicized. It takes (took in my case) a soul deep commitment to the unborn child to find that research (that was primarily funded by government grants, not breast cancer research organization grants) that means mother could live WITH her baby and both be cancer-free!

Finding a local person to donate your money to may take a little more footwork (or finger walking in this digital age), but the rewards are tremendous! Not only can you get a warm and fuzzy feeling from knowing you helped someone. That someone directly benefits and above all KNOWS there are people out there who care! God bless!!!