More pain

I'm not sure what I did, but I'm having SERIOUS chest spasms. It all started by me trying to adjust the back of my bra with my left arm/hand.  I initially used 1/2 a Valium & 1/2 a Lortab. The pain was so bad that I couldn't wait until I got home (it was 330), so I had to call my dad to ride home with him to medicate. That means I had to leave my borrowed (from MIL) car in the parking lot over night. I also have to get up extra early to ride with dad. I'm so thankful to have that as an option!

Even with the meds I was hurting so much on the way home & when I arrived home that I could barely hug the kids or Andrew. I tried to take a hot bath to relax the muscles. However, the pain got worse by simply lifting a book slightly above my head.. I've taken another Lortab & still can't move much. :-( I'm in so much pain that I couldn't even dry myself after my bath. Thankfully Andrew is a wonderful husband! <3 He even coated my chest with Theragesic (like Ben-Gay or Icy Hot, but stronger).

When, oh, when will this end?? I was feeling optimistic after talking to the chiropractor today. I've apparently made progress that pleased the doctor. According to him my nervous system (according to the scans from today) is in good shape. Of course we also spoke about how my body apparently is one of the 2 out of 10 that doesn't follow the text-books.

More pain

I'm not sure what I did, but I'm having SERIOUS chest spasms. It all started by me trying to adjust the back of my bra with my left arm/hand.  I initially used 1/2 a Valium & 1/2 a Lortab. The pain was so bad that I couldn't wait until I got home (it was 330), so I had to call my dad to ride home with him to medicate. That means I had to leave my borrowed (from MIL) car in the parking lot over night. I also have to get up extra early to ride with dad. I'm so thankful to have that as an option!

Even with the meds I was hurting so much on the way home & when I arrived home that I could barely hug the kids or Andrew. I tried to take a hot bath to relax the muscles. However, the pain got worse by simply lifting a book slightly above my head.. I've taken another Lortab & still can't move much. :-( I'm in so much pain that I couldn't even dry myself after my bath. Thankfully Andrew is a wonderful husband! <3 He even coated my chest with Theragesic (like Ben-Gay or Icy Hot, but stronger).

When, oh, when will this end?? I was feeling optimistic after talking to the chiropractor today. I've apparently made progress that pleased the doctor. According to him my nervous system (according to the scans from today) is in good shape. Of course we also spoke about how my body apparently is one of the 2 out of 10 that doesn't follow the text-books.

Confusion

Andrew & I drove to Louisville to see Dr. W (my new-old plastic surgeon) Friday. Dr. W was very professional and courteous. He examined me and approved of the implant placement and appearance. However, he differed significantly from Dr. S (plastic surgeon from Evansville) about several things. First, he disagreed about the degree of bottoming-out I have. He didn't seem to think bottoming-out was much of an issue. He also disagreed about further surgery. His advice was to give myself closer to a year to heal and see if that mitigates the pain issues I'm having. He did not think smaller implants would help the pain issues or be aesthetically pleasing. He was actually quite concerned about another surgery so soon after my other issues of the past year (or two). He was also of a different opinion from Dr. S about the degree of retraction of my pectoral muscles. He had me push my hand down on my hip. Doing so moved the implant -- proving to him that the implant is indeed under the muscle. I pointed out that Dr. S said that the muscle had attached to the skin -- causing the implant to move when the muscle contracted. He looked dubious about that. Both explanations make logical/anatomical sense to me. However, he could not explain my lack of collar-bone hollows after my mastectomy & reconstruction. Like Dr. S he also doesn't really have any idea why I am having pain issues. However, unlike Dr. S he gave me some muscle relaxers since to it seems the pain originates with muscle spasms and/or contractions. The doctors bra preferences are also markedly different -- Dr S recommends very tight underwires, but Dr. W recommends well-fitting and supportive sports bras. He recommended even trying some sporting-goods stores (like Dick's) for some high $$, high performance, high support bras.

All-in-all I think it was a good visit. It wasn't what I was hoping, but at least he seems more concerned with getting me to feel better as opposed to simply focusing on my appearance. I actually broke down and teared up when I was trying to explain that something needs to be done to help me. I pointed out that I'm only 30 and already going to a pain management doctor. I go back in a month. He told me to continue seeing the pain management doctor for the time being. He also suggested to continue (re-start) my massage therapy. As I told him, at this point I am grasping at any straw presented to me.

July is *the* month!!!

July started with my birthday as usual on the 1st. Then my mom's birthday (the 2nd). Then a 4th of July party on the 3rd, followed by another one on the 4th. Then on the 5th I had my first pain injections. Now today, the 7th, is my cancerversary. Two years ago today I was diagnosed. Two years ago today my life changed for the worse in some ways, but for the better in other ways. On the 8th I'm going back to the plastic surgeon in Louisville for a 2nd opinion on my implant problems. On the 10th it'll be 2 years since I found out Rachel was indeed a Rachel & not a Joshua! On the 14th it'll be 5 years since Andrew proposed to me. On the 15th I get paid! :-D That's just the first 1/2 of the month! Whew - no wonder I'm so tired!