Schedule set

I got my surgery time. At 11am I'll hopefully be going under. I can't wait for the 'happy' juice!! I'm kind of nervous. Ok I'll admit, I'm a lot nervous. This surgery is nothing compared to the last one, but i feel just as nervous as before. Hopefully I'll be ok. Timeto start my nasty prep. :-(

We have arrived

We made it to Houston this afternoon. It's such a long trip... Bleh! Tomorrow I have only one appointment scheduled. Then I think we'll try to do something moderately fun. The worst thing will be that I have to do my icky surgery prep & not eat after 6 pm. Oh well.

Drumroll please... Blood counts are...

OK!!! They're not exceptionally high or anything. Actually, I'm just barely squeaking by with a whole 0.4 over the absolute minimum! However, it should be good enough for surgery next Tuesday (August 31st). I can't decide if I'm nervous or just anxious to get this phase of my life FINISHED. We're leaving the kiddos behind Saturday to make our way to Houston. Dad's coming w/ us, but mom will man the fort (and the kids) while we're away!

I did my public speaking engagement yesterday for the Making Strides kick-off breakfast! It was great! I stood there w/ Rachel on my hip. She, of course, tried to steal the show by grabbing the microphone & babbling a bit. I just honestly told my story, & of course I left a bit of what I wanted to say out (that's the problem w/ not having note-cards or a page to read from). I think a lot of the people there were suitably moved & happy to hear my story. I got some laughs & a lot of head nods &/or head shakes when I emphasized that the only 2 choices most women know about are terminating their unborn baby or possibly dying from their cancer. My goal is to share that there *is* a 3rd option that is entirely viable - have the baby & treatment at the same time!

I'm so blessed to have the opportunity to share my story with such wonderful caring people. I'm even more blessed to be surrounded by the wonderful, caring, loving people like my family & friends that have supported me through this entire situation. Its not finished yet, & I'm not entirely certain I'll ever be 'over it', but I know with the support I have I'll beat this!

Public speaking...

I'm in a somewhat unique situation since I went through cancer treatment while pregnant. Most people don't know or even understand that this can be accomplished. I've been contacted by two organizations as of now to speak about my blessing/curse. One is the local American Cancer Society's Making Strides against breast cancer breakfast on August 25th. The other is still in the 'maybe' stage - the "World's Biggest Baby Shower" in McLean County. I'm actually *really* excited. I would love to get my foot in the door & try to be an inspirational speaker sharing my story of life & love. I want people all over to realize that no one's life has to end when you're pregnant and diagnosed with a disease. I'd like some tips on how to realize this goal...

I would also absolutely love to write a book (short story?) about my blessing/curse. Its a secret dream of mine to be a writer. I *love* to read & would absolutely think it awesome if I could give others something to enjoy & maybe even inspire. I have to say that I've mostly thought about fiction, not non-fiction, but again, I'm more than willing to try to get my foot in the door. In other words, tips would be greatly appreciated for this endeavor too!

I wish...

Time is passing slowly & sometimes I wish it would speed up. Time passes quickly & sometimes I wish it would slow down. I guess it just depends on where I am at the moment. Most of the times I live inside my head a completely different life than anyone else even suspects. I bleed most frequently on so-called anonymous online sites like this one, FB, & some bulletin boards. However, even there (here) I don't always really get out everything I feel. Its too scary & makes me feel weak & vulnerable. Sometimes I wish I could express myself fully, but I don't know how... here's a song that entirely speaks my feelings... Listen real hard to the lyrics.

SheDaisy - I Wish I Were the Rain

Surgery date...

I get to have my surgery August 31st as long as my blood levels cooperate. I'm having the combined reconstruction with hysterectomy surgery done in Houston. You can be that I'll have my blood checked before I leave KY!!!

Funny Simon story... I've posted before that he has commented on my 'balloons' (expanders look like coconuts strapped under my skin). Well, he noticed them the other night & asked what happened to my 'other' ones. I told him the doctors had to cut them off. He immediately said back to me, "They got caught in the cactuses!" Now if you've ever heard him say 'cactuses' you'd know one reason this is so funny to me... He has a way of stressing the 1st syllable and drawing the word out much longer than it is. Its actually very funny to hear. Only a 2 year old! ;-)

Poor Rachel got bit on the hand by some bug (not a brown recluse spider) and had an allergic reaction to it. Her little hand swelled all up like a lobster claw. She went to the doctor yesterday for it & was pronounced fine. She was also weighed... She's 21.5 lbs!! She's a BIG girl! :-) She's also starting to crawl. Its so cute b/c she rolls from side to side. Its hilarious to watch!