Friday, August 13, 2010

I wish...

Time is passing slowly & sometimes I wish it would speed up. Time passes quickly & sometimes I wish it would slow down. I guess it just depends on where I am at the moment. Most of the times I live inside my head a completely different life than anyone else even suspects. I bleed most frequently on so-called anonymous online sites like this one, FB, & some bulletin boards. However, even there (here) I don't always really get out everything I feel. Its too scary & makes me feel weak & vulnerable. Sometimes I wish I could express myself fully, but I don't know how... here's a song that entirely speaks my feelings... Listen real hard to the lyrics.

SheDaisy - I Wish I Were the Rain

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My Chemo-Jane hair-style

My Chemo-Jane hair-style
I just had to have my mom buzz my hair because it was falling out so badly.

Pre-op wearing my hand-crocheted cap with my prayer shawl.

Pre-op wearing my hand-crocheted cap with my prayer shawl.
My loving husband is watching me distract myself with a game on his iPhone.

2 days after my BMX w/ 100ccs in the TEs

2 days after my BMX w/ 100ccs in the TEs
I even have a fashionable belt to hold up my drains.

3 weeks post-op w/ 400ccs in each TE

3 weeks post-op w/ 400ccs in each TE
The smile is fake because the TEs were irritating!